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Memorial Gardens Are Divine
By Earl Erickson
It all started out as a birthday gift for my wife,
Bobbie. I bought her a real-size, painted, concrete
bear. It looked so real. She loved it. Then I placed it
in a circle and added a wooden, miniature windmill next
to it. Then it looked so cool, we decided to plant roses
around it. And last, but not least, I painted a big rock
that was already there, and painted the words Bobbie's
Mountain, in black lettering. I painted the background
of the rock sky blue, and drew a picture of Mt. Rainier,
in white. Afterwards, we named our property, Bobbie's
Mountain.
After Bobbie passed away in 2001, from cancer, I made
this spot a memorial garden. It was later moved to a
temporary location, because it obstructed a path to my
new driveway. Then when I moved in to my new home next
door, I relocated everything over to my new front yard,
minus the windmill, it decayed from rot, so I discarded
it.
The thing I like the most about a memorial garden at
home, is that it's always right there at your
fingertips. No traveling to a cemetery all the time.
This idea is especially nice if you live in the south
Puget Sound area, and your family cemetery is in Gig
Harbor, Washington, where there is a new $800 million
toll bridge being built and the traffic is your worst
nightmare.
However, having a memorial garden of your own shouldn't
substitute a trip to the cemetery on important holidays.
A personal memorial garden should be a private place to
pray and think about your loved ones daily. It's not
practical to visit a cemetery daily, unless you live
close by. Even so, having it in your own yard is very
special.
I think every person in this world should have a
memorial garden in their yard or a simple arrangement in
their home. Are there any reasons why you should not?
Maybe one. If it keeps you from going to the cemetery
when you should. A cemetery visit three times per year
isn't going to kill you. I visit my wife, my mom and
dad, my grandparents, my brothers and my aunt and uncles
at the cemetery every Easter, Memorial Day and
Christmas. That's the way I was raised. I understand
some aren't able to, but if it's laziness--that's no
excuse.
A loving tribute to a spouse, relative, friend or a pet
can easily be set up in the home. It doesn't have to be
a shrine. A simple plant surrounded by some photographs
or mementos may be just fine. I think every person or
pet deserves to be honored one way or another. It's a
celebration of life.
If you have a yard, what a perfect reason to set up a
memorial garden. It doesn't have to be fancy. A few
plants and flowers and a simple home made memorial
marker carved out of wood is perfect. It would be a
great theme for the perfect country garden. Just imagine
how it will make you feel.
Exchanging plants with another friend or member of the
family, who also has a memorial garden, can be a lot of
fun. Make a party out of it. Remember what your mom or
dad liked or what they reminded you of--and add it to
your garden.
If your dad reminded you of an outdoorsman, then adding
things to your garden might be fishing gear, hunting
gear, hiking gear or camping gear or all the above. If
he was a sports lover, then golf, baseball, football,
basketball, soccer or any other sport may be what you're
looking for. If your dad was handy with tools, then make
a memorial of him on your workbench and create a theme
for your workshop, like-for instance, Harold's Workshop:
"In Memory of my Dad," would fit in nicely off to the
side or on a pegboard.
If your dad passed away and left you an old truck,
hardly worth fixing, drill some big holes in the bottom
of the truck bed for drainage, shovel a heaping pile of
topsoil, then have fun planting a memorial garden on his
old pickup truck, then create a theme for it.
If your mom reminds you of gardening, put her favorite
tools in her garden and create a theme. When my mother
passed away, and we sold her house, I gathered up most
of her plants and flowers she loved and hauled them over
to my house. Then I carved a heart--shaped out of wood,
painted it pink, and in red lettering I put the words
Amanda's Garden. It was really cool. I had a memorial
garden in memory of my mom. It was so special, because
now I could tend the garden where she left off and keep
the living plants alive.
If your mom was an outstanding cook, and you really
weren't the gardener she was or you didn't have a yard,
create the memorial inside your home--in the kitchen, by
hanging a plate to the wall that say the words--for
instance, Dorothy's Kitchen: "In Memory of my Mom." Any
engraving shop will fix you up. Place her favorite
recipes out for others to see. If she loved to can
pickles or preserves, and if you have any of her canned
goods left over, proudly display them.
Now it's time for brother or sister. Think of the things
that remind you of them, then make a memorial out of it.
Your sister's busy cell phone or your brother's loud
guitar or drums, make great additions to a memorial.
The list goes on and on, but I bet you get the idea. I
got a little extravagant--but I wanted to include my
wife, my mom and dad, and my aunt and uncle. I bought a
30 foot flagpole, added the birthday gift I had given my
wife when she was living--a real size, painted, concrete
bear. Then I had a granite marker, almost the size of a
headstone in a cemetery, and I had engraved the
following words on the marker, "In loving memory of my
wife, Bobbie Jean, my yellow rose of Texas, who
affectionately named this land, Bobbie's Mountain. And
to my aunt and uncle, Edith and Vernon Thomson, who made
my dream home come true. And to my parents, Amanda and
Hank Erickson, who gave me life and love." Then I
planted a couple Japanese maple trees, a couple
hydrangeas and rhododendrons, some bear grass and yellow
roses with a crawling ground cover. It looks beautiful
and I'm always right there to enjoy it. It gives me
peace and comfort.
I wanted to include my aunt and uncle in my memorial
garden, because we were very close and they left me a
very generous inheritance to build my new dream home.
Now I have the best of both worlds in my memorial
garden. I am honoring my wife, my parents and my aunt
and uncle--all in one beautiful memorial garden.
Now it's your turn to get creative and find peace and
tranquility in your life. After all, memorial gardens
are divine. |
