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Dealing With the Death of a Loved One
By Jim Moustakas
There is nothing so heartbreaking as experiencing and
dealing with the death of a loved one. No one can
possibly contemplate the enormity of those feelings of
grief or compensate for the gaping vacuum that you might
be enduring currently and only time can help to soften
the impact. Grief and depression are often inextricably
linked and it affects all on a highly personalized
basis, it will be impossible for you to compare your
feelings with anyone else and coping with any trauma is
difficult but the comprehension of death can be so
difficult to absorb.
Dealing with the death of a loved one is never going to
be easy- that's a fact. Death has such a far reaching
impact that it can be hard to comprehend that this
person has actually gone, and the loss of someone close
can have a hugely detrimental effect on how you think
and feel and generally cope in everyday life. You might
find yourself feeling strangely detached from it all or
alternatively, highly emotive, irritable and
experiencing moments or rage and angst. People talk
about the grieving process as if it is a stepping stone
towards full recovery but life is realistically never
going to be the same. This is not to say that your life
will no longer have a richness and quality to it, but it
will take time for you to be able to grow from this
experience. There is no right way to cope with grief and
no manual written that can help you when dealing with
the death of a loved one, especially if the connection
between the two of you has been very strong. It is ok to
feel wretched and to feel that life has gone horribly
wrong but as time progresses, the feeling of intense
sadness and pain will soften and blur and memories of
good times and lessons learned will start seeping back
into your mind and these will become a comfort.
People often believe that grief and depression are one
and the same and this is not true, but the deep sadness
caused through grief can mirror the symptoms so it is
worth going to speak to your doctor to see whether
medication is required. There is no shame involved with
reaching out for help, once communication begins, the
healing process will gradually start. During times of
loss, speaking to a qualified counselor, who is skilled
in bereavement techniques, can offer you much comfort at
this time. Talking to others in your family may be
beneficial too but there will be times when you feel
unable to open up or to discuss your deepest fears with
them or them with you. A counselor can guide you through
the process whilst listening to your inner- most
concerns. The stages of grief depression must be
followed but understanding why you feel the way you do
is important because it help to make some sense of the
confusion. Bereavement support will help make dealing
with the death of a loved one; a less traumatic and
frightening experience and enable you to progress
through the grieving process and emerge the other side.
Jim Moustakas is the CEO of My Life Assistant Pty Ltd an
online counseling and life coaching interactive
platform.
My Life Assistant provides a live 24 hour counseling or
coaching service by qualified counselors, psychologists
and life coaches from around the world.
To get full access now please visit http://www.mylifeassistant.com/depression/loss.aspx
select whether you are a general user or a therapist and
get started right away. |
