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How to Have a Happy Funeral
By Alice Reiter Feld
We live in a time where customization and tradition are
forever merging and planning your eternal rest is one of
the most intimate and personal decisions you will ever
make. It would not surprise me if your memories of the
funerals of loved one's past, are of a somber, solemn
and sad model. Those funerals reflected the wishes of
the people that were planning those funerals, but it
does not have to be that way.
There are many ways you may plan the funeral/celebration
of the life of a loved one; you may add a favorite song,
a special poem, a theme that reflects the passion of the
person's life, the use of certain colors, where the
funeral will be held and many others that reflect the
life of the deceased.
Your decision will also be affected by whichever faith
you are a member of or whichever cultural belief system
you hold dear. The important thing to know is that this
is your funeral and that you have the right to choose to
plan it as you would like your life to be celebrated. We
live in a time where it is appropriate to celebrate life
while mourning and grieving; this is not disrespectful.
The joy and sorrow that we feel when someone we love has
died is a healthy balance for us to feel.
You will have many choices in planning your happy
funeral. You will be offered many products and services
ranging from; funeral service options - chapel,
graveside, at sea, coral reef - to caskets, urns, above
ground, in ground or cremation services. Our office
works with distinguished professionals in the field of
Funeral Service who will help you design a unique and
special commemoration to the person whose funeral you
are planning.
Some of the options and benefits you can choose from in
making either your funeral plans or the plans of a loved
one include:
1. Pre Planning all of your funeral - The benefits of
pre planning are that while you are younger and in good
health you make an informed and educated decision that
you and your loved ones agree on; your children or heirs
will not have to do this during a time of sadness and
pain; you will save nearly one third of the cost by pre
planning and you will have time to pay off this purchase
rather than having to pay the entire amount all at once,
thereby locking in your costs so that your children and
heirs will have no need to pay any additional monies at
the time of need; you can select the style of funeral -
chapel, graveside, at sea, in nature, in ground,
mausoleum, cremation or other; you can meet with
representatives of different funeral homes and choose
the people that best reflect your values and ethics.
2. Legal Needs in preplanning and after death occurs -
There are many legal issues that you and your family
will need to consider when planning your funeral, which
is why it makes sense to consult with a board certified
elder law attorney who can ably assist you. Executing a
durable Power of Attorney so that you and your family
have no issues when the time comes. Some of important
legal matters include: Accounts With: Banks, Building
Security, Post Office, Securities, Bonds, Insurance
policies, mortgage papers, rental leases, credit cards,
phone, electricity, gas, car, home insurance, cable TV
and the list goes on.
3. Notification of death - Notify the necessary people
upon a death so that you may focus upon grieving and
celebrating at this difficult time. Many of those people
include: Employer, Tax Office, Social Security, Passport
Office, Pension Departments, Professional Associations,
Medical Examiner, Drivers license, doctors, schools,
post office to change mail arrangements and more.
4. Impact of death on surviving spouse or family members
-Family members may find it difficult to cope with the
financial stress that can be caused by the sudden or
expectant death of a loved one. There are legal remedies
available to help you and your beloved family members be
taken care, help pay for your funeral expenses, receive
veteran's benefits, government support and other
solutions that many people are not aware of.
5. Some things you can do after the funeral to help you
and the bereaved feel better are: stay in touch with
adult children, make a donation in memory of the
deceased, send a handwritten note, go to a support group
meeting with the person, help with daily house chores -
shopping, cleaning,etc., provide transportation, take
the kids to the movies, email messages of love and
support, invite the survivor to join you in walking,
exercise or activity, visit the grave with the survivor
and whatever else you can think of. Be a friend, accept
their right to grieve as they need to and listen to
their pain.
Through the years I have had assisted many families in
the planning of their funerals, both in advance as well
as at the time of death. I highly recommend the pre
planning of all your estate planning needs which
includes your funeral service. For more information,
please feel free to contact me on Funeral Planning and
other legal issues.
Alice Reiter Feld, Esq., PA, CELA is a Board-Certified
Elder Law Attorney By The Florida Bar and The National
Elder Law Foundation. She is AV-Rated, the highest
rating afforded to attorneys. A nationally-known expert
on Veteran's Benefits for Long-Term Care, Alice is
sought-after to speak to students of law, elder care
facility administrators, the senior community-at-large,
as well as teaches this subject to elder law attorneys.
Alice Reiter Feld is available for Seminars, Talks, and
In-Service Training on all Elder Law topics. If you are
interested in having Alice Reiter Feld speak at your
Firm, contact Outreach Coordinator, Elana Murray:
954.726.6602 or email: elana@florida-elderlaw.com |
