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Funerals - Planning The Details
By Michael Russell
In our previous article, we talked about the basic
decisions which have to be made when planning a funeral.
We covered the venue, whether or not the service would
be religious and the choice of coffin and interim
resting place for the body.
To begin, we'll stay with the funeral director. A decent
one will be guiding you though the maze of choices you
have to make with the minimum of fuss.
You will need to tell him whether you want his staff to
carry the coffin or whether you have male friends or
relatives who wish to do this. In any event, the
undertaker should provide sufficient manpower in case
any of the bearers don't feel up to the task on the day.
You must decide what funeral cars you want, apart from
the hearse. You don't have to have any, of course, as
these add to the cost quite considerably, but if would
be quite normal to only have a car for the immediate
family of the deceased. These cars usually hold about
six passengers.
Announcing the funeral in the press can be tricky. In
these unfortunate times, criminals often take advantage
of a householder's absence at a funeral to burgle their
house. If you do want to announce the funeral, it may be
as well to ask a friend to house sit while you are out.
Flowers are another difficult one. People like to send
flowers but they soon fade and you may choose for people
to donate what they would have spent on flowers to a
charity of your choice. The undertaker should administer
this and keep a record of those who donated so that you
can send thank you letters. Normally, people will quite
understand if you ask for family flowers only or just
have one large arrangement for the coffin.
Finally, if there's to be a burial, you will need a
memorial stone of some kind. If there will be a
cremation, you may have the opportunity to adopt a rose,
have the ashes buried or scattered or have an entry in a
memorial book.
Away from the funeral director, you will need to meet
or, at the very least, speak to whomever is going to
officiate at the service, if any. This is relatively
easy if you've chosen your local church but if there
will be a cremation and you don't want the duty priest,
you will need to ask your vicar or whoever, whether they
are able to attend another venue.
You will have to provide some detail of the deceased so
that the official can say appropriate words. Don't
forget to advise what their preferred form of address
was. For example if the deceased was called Jennifer but
always insisted that it was shortened to Jen, tell
whoever is conducting the service.
You may want someone other than the official to provide
a eulogy or read a poem or whatever but don't forget to
check that they are willing to do it. You will also need
to choose music. For a church service this will be one
or two hymns and maybe another favourite piece.
Cremations are usually so time limited that one hymn or
piece of music will probably be all that there's time
for.
Lastly, you'll need to decide what to do about a wake
but we'll discuss that in another article.
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Michael Russell
Your Independent guide to Funerals [http://funeral.free-resource-guide.com] |
